Here were some of my failed New Years Resolutions from years past:
:occasion::drinkers:
RESOLUTION #1::occasion::drinkers:
2002: I will read at least 20 good books a year.
2003: I will read at least 10 books a year.
2004 I will read 5 books a year.
2005: I will finish The Pelican Brief
2006: I will read some articles in the newspaper this year.
2007: I will read at least one article this year.
2008: I will try and finish the comics section this year.
RESOLUTION #2:
2002: I will get my weight down below 180.
2003: I will watch my calories until I get below 190.
2004: I will follow my new diet religiously until I get below 200.
2005: I will try to develop a realistic attitude about my weight.
2006: I will work out 5 days a week.
2007: I will work out 3 days a week.
2008: I will try to drive past a gym at least once a week.
RESOLUTION #3:
2002: I will not spend my money frivolously.
2003: I will pay off my bank loan promptly.
2004: I will pay off my bank loans promptly.
2005 I will begin making a strong effort to be out of debt by 2006
2006: I will be totally out of debt by 2007.
2007: I will try to pay off the debt interest by 2008.
2008: I will try to be out of the country by 2009.
RESOLUTION #4:
1988: I will try to be a better wife to Mike
1990: I will not leave Mike.
1991: I will try for a reconciliation with Mike
2006: I will try to be a better wife to David
RESOLUTION #5:
1987: I will stop looking at other men.
1988: I will not get involved with Mike.
1989: I will not let Mike pressure me into marriage.
1990 I will stop looking at other men.
RESOLUTION #6:
2005: I will not let my boss push me around.
2006: I will not let my sadistic boss drive me to the point of suicide.
2007: I will stick up for my rights when my boss bullies me.
2008: I will tell Dr. Phil and the group about my boss.
RESOLUTION #7:
2005: I will not get upset when Julie makes jokes about my ass.
2006: I will not get annoyed when Julie kids me about my Lypo.
2007: I will not get angry when Julie tells the guys I wear a girdle.
2008: I will not speak to Julie.
RESOLUTION #8:
2005: I will not take a drink before 5:00 p.m.
2006: I will not touch the bottle before noon.
2007: I will not become a "problem drinker".
2008: I will not miss any more AA meetings.
RESOLUTION #9:
2005: I will see my dentist this year.
2006: I will have my cavities filled this year.
2007: I will have my root canal work done this year.
2008: I will get rid of my denture breath this year.
RESOLUTION #10:
2005: I will go to church every Sunday.
2006: I will go to church as often as possible.
2007: I will set aside time each day for prayer and meditation.
2008: I will try to catch the late night sermonette on TV.
How about y'all out there? Any resolutions happening?
8)
(Besides I will not Make ANY Resolutions this year)
(Besides I will not Make ANY Resolutions this year)
