for all youz biz owners...
(sent by a friend in the "depressed" housing mkt)
A Contractor:
A gambler who never gets to shuffle, cut or deal.
An Opening Bid:
poker game in which the losing hand wins.
A Bid:
A wild guess carried out to two decimal places.
An Engineers Estimate:
The cost of construction in heaven.
The Critical Path Method:
A management technique for losing your shirt under perfect control.
OSHA:
A protective coating made by half-baking a mixture of fine print,
red tape, split hairs and baloney... usually applied at random with a shotgun.
A Strike:
An effort to increase egg production by strangling the chicken.
Completion Date:
The point at which liquidation damages begin.
Liquidation Damages:
A penalty for failing to achieve the impossible.
An Auditor:
One who goes in after the war is lost and bayonets the wounded.
A Lawyer:
One who goes in after the auditor and strips the bodies.
(sent by a friend in the "depressed" housing mkt)
A Contractor:
A gambler who never gets to shuffle, cut or deal.
An Opening Bid:
poker game in which the losing hand wins.
A Bid:
A wild guess carried out to two decimal places.
An Engineers Estimate:
The cost of construction in heaven.
The Critical Path Method:
A management technique for losing your shirt under perfect control.
OSHA:
A protective coating made by half-baking a mixture of fine print,
red tape, split hairs and baloney... usually applied at random with a shotgun.
A Strike:
An effort to increase egg production by strangling the chicken.
Completion Date:
The point at which liquidation damages begin.
Liquidation Damages:
A penalty for failing to achieve the impossible.
An Auditor:
One who goes in after the war is lost and bayonets the wounded.
A Lawyer:
One who goes in after the auditor and strips the bodies.